It was that bad.

Ok, back to me being lame in High School.

I went through a bit of a phase, 10th? 11th grade? I don't remember the time but I remember the phase. I had a crush on no less than 3 skater bois, and all up and decided one day that I would become a skater girl.

Right. Whitebread hillbilly, Right.

I have all the grace and balance of a hippo on stilts so the actual skating thing was sort of out. AND I didn't yet know the phrase "poser" yet so, well, there ya go. Maybe I thought I was being "goth" and it would just meld with the skate look, I don't know, but it didn't turn out all that well.

All the rage at that time was to wear "skater chains" You know those little metal ball "chains" that businesses use to keep people from stealing their ink pens? Yeah those and in every size from original to jumbo marble size. I had quite a limited budget working at Dairy Queen, and if I recall correctly I tried to steal the little chain that held the sink stopper from my parents bathroom sink at one point. Oh yeah, that's cool.

SO of course out came the HORRID nail polish colors, green, black ect, and wretched baggy pants. (Jay-bird you know you had those pants too) we thought we were so cool in those high-waisted baggy monstrosities.

I REALLY thought I was cutting edge when I came up with the "idea" of putting safety pins in my ears as earrings. Right, until my mom smiled at me and told me about how she used to do that when she was a kid. I pretended that I didn't hear that and went smugly on my way.

At one point, oh I can't believe I'm going to type this, but yes at one point I got the bright idea of tying a small chain (like a real chain not a "skater" chain) around my FOOT and let it drag behind me about 6 inches as I walked.

Walked down the halls of my high school. Yes. Really. I think I had some psycho bullshit symbolism worked out in my teenage head that made it cool to me but well come on REALLY !!! OOOOOHHHHH I still to this day don't know what honestly possessed me to do that one. It has to be that teenagers for real are insane for a couple of years. Oh man.

I never stopped for even a moment to think about how I would across to the skater bois I so wanted to impress. A baggy, safety pined, ugly nailed, chain draggin weirdo. That's kind of what I figure. I was so wrapped up in trying to be like them so they would LIKE me that I never looked in the mirror or considered what I was really doing.

The skater bois always dated the girls that were cute and just wore the tight little skater music t-shirts. I didn't really get that, I guess I was impersonating the wrong gender. Ooops.

Ok so yes thankfully now that I'm older I've fully grasped the whole "have to be yourself" thing, so no worries there.

There, so now you have a teeny bit of idea of how I nurtured my reputation in high school. Don't worry, there's more to come. God save the Queen there's more.